Live Your Rhythm

One of the things I love about life is the opportunity to talk and connect with people.  I've had some truly incredible, and sometimes emotional, interactions with random people, acquaintances and new friends.  These experiences have added value to my life and sometimes provide a new path for introspection.  It's in these moments that I've felt my heart swell, find direction and beat a little quicker.

On the contrary, some folks don't find this connection.  Instead they make a comparison; a juxtaposition of lives that ignites resentment.  These are your critics.

"The path to personal fulfillment comes from your heart, not your critics." ~ me

I've recently heard a phrase, while talking to one of my customers, that really stuck with me.  It was one of those phrases that makes you stop and really try to digest every word: Live your rhythm.  You've got to design your own flow, at your own pace, with your own motivations and inspirations.  The trick is finding like-minded people who encourage your journey, value your effort and believe in you, and the question is how do you find those people.

It's a question of balancing vulnerability and self-assuredness.  You will never realize the life you envision for yourself if you don't expose your intentions and your heart.  Your path is drawn by your heart, paved with desire, goals and fulfillment.  All too often we undervalue the voice inside but overvalue the voices of the critics.  Remember the critics?  The ones who are unable to support your journey because they compare and contrast life.

Living your rhythm means, to me, creating your direction and pace through life in harmony with your dreams.  It means listening to your own voice, your own heartbeat and your own intentions rather than those who project their own frustrations onto you.  It means navigating life the way you choose to navigate it, connecting with positive influences who contribute to the value of your life, experiencing the triumph of unabashedly opening your heart to the world and feeling the absolute peace of fulfillment.

"What happens when people open their hearts? They get better." ~ Haruki Murakami        

Thoughts on Watching Others Succeed

"Non nobis solum nati summum." ~ Marcus Tullius Cicero

This phrase translates to "Not for ourselves alone are we born."  There is something about this phrase that just sticks with me and, oddly enough, makes me appreciate social media.  I think back to the first time I heard about Instagram and the criticism: Why do people care about the pictures you post?

I care...sometimes.  I care when I see your struggle, your discipline, your dedication and achievement.  As a result I subscribe to people who's journeys I care to see, the people within whom I see these traits.  I care because we are all in this together, yet we are all on our own journeys.  I care because you and I seem to have common interests.  I care because I've been in the bleachers of an Ironman finish, closing in on the midnight deadline and I've seen the pain in your face as you push through to cross the line.  With an empathetic and encouraging heart, I care because I know the voices in our heads are sometimes so convincing that they can't be ignored.  And social media is a great platform for this documentary of life and achievement.

I have often thought about two ideologies that seem to contradict one another.  The thought that no one has the power to cause us pain by criticizing us unless we let them and the other thought that our own words have the power to build or destroy.  These are contradictory to me because it's a play on the locus on control.  We either have the internal fortitude to shrug off negativity or we believe we have the power to alter someone's entire world with our utterances.  Is it in us or not?  Is it in them or not?  Is the struggle internal or external?  Are we our own hero or do we succumb to the antagonists of the world?  Maybe what's really most important is not whether others have some impact on our journey, but that to achieve a purposeful life we need to positively impact others.

"Doing nothing for others is the undoing of ourselves." ~ Horace Mann 

My point of this thought is this: I believe there is no greater human experience than cheering for someone else to succeed.  I believe in great personal experiences, but to be human means to participate in humanity, and I believe we have an innate necessity to participate in the human achievement.  The voices spewing doubt in our heads, or outside our heads, are bullshit, and we all know that.  But the voices singing our praise are real, and we need to remember that.

I've been focusing my attention on the concept of vulnerability for a bit now.  The goal, any goal, of achievement is laying yourself on the line.  It's literally stepping forward to take on more.  It's a show of willingness to try and fail more than anything else.  As witnesses to this brave step forward we should have no other reaction that honest encouragement.

"I want to treat all of life like an Ironman finishing chute: on my feet, tears of joy in my eyes, fully engaged and cheering at the top of my lungs for those around me to succeed." ~ me

The Olympics are a fantastic demonstration of our willingness to support our fellow (wo)man.  But why should that support be any different than the support we give our training buddies, friends, neighbors, acquaintances or even perfect strangers?  I find incredible inspiration from the people I find and follow on Instagram.  Your journey is amazing and you are amazing.  Remember that.

The next time you scroll across someone's Instagram feed and see a photo of their alarm set for 4:00am with some sort of motivational message, or see a photo of their three hour trainer ride, or read some comment about how cold the pool is at 5:00am, remember they have faced the same doubts and challenges you do.  The difference is that they chose not to listen to the doubt, nor the critics.  They chose to put themselves on the line and share their journey.  That locus of control lives within them.  This is their journey so our only hope is that they hear our cheers just enough to push a little harder, hang on a little longer and reach a little farther.