Locus of Control

There seems to be two different ideologies out there concerning happiness and success.  At times I have struggled to see how they're connected.  Recently, in a discussion with my partner, I mentioned my opinion that these ideologies seem to conflict with one another.  The topic concerns an upcoming decision I feel I need to make.  She, in yet another example of her brilliance, named the dilemma I was finally realizing.

In terms of happiness, some common thoughts revolve around the idea that we should make the best of any situation.

"Bloom where you are planted."

"Things turn out best for the people who make the best of the way things turn out."

I understand the mentality here.  I've been in situations in which I repeated these thoughts to myself and they've helped.  I believe there is always a glimmer of hope in a situation if you train yourself to look for it.  In doing so, you train your mind to begin to see beyond the undesirable qualities of a particular circumstance.  But, my problem with this ideology is that it almost seems passive.  It's a "sit back and accept" mentality.  I disagree with that. 

Conversely, the other ideology focuses on making the effort to succeed.  It's about taking that leap of faith to create the life of your dreams.

"Control your own destiny or someone else will."

"The best way to predict the future is to create it."

This mentality is one of action.  One of grabbing life by the horns and making it what you want.  Do you see the contrast here?  It's acceptance versus action.  I am at the point in my life where I find real value in being the captain of my ship.  This is my life.  And, this one moment in time is a gift to me.  Why not make it the life I want it to be?  No one else but me has the responsibility or opportunity to make it worthwhile.

This is my dilemma: I find value in both ideologies depending on the situation.  My partner named this for me.  It's called Locus of Control.  This is a term used to describe whether someone feels in control of what happens to them.  That definition seems results-oriented, an afterthought.

I know I look at life with an internal locus of control.  I choose to place more practical value on framing my decisions with this mentality.  I know that I prefer to take an affirmative role in my life and make decisions.  I want to control what happens to me.  I also accept responsibility for the successes and failures that come from those decisions.  But the bottom line is that I want to create the life of my dreams.  After all...

"The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams."